It has been a while since I posted, life just keeps surprising me...
Post #6 is going to leave the hospital scene and talk about recovery.
After being dismissed from the hospital which took 2 days, and 2 allergic reactions to different nurses giving me Loratab (the first nurse who discovered this apparently did not tell the nurse who came on shift after her about my allergy and her previous experience). I was not happy about leaving Brandon in Birmingham, who had just moved up to be with me 2 weeks prior, or my puppy, Sasha. But I did what was best for me and went home with my mom to be taken care of. My mother and I have never communicated well and the fact that I was about to become the greatest inconvenience she had known yet was a dreadful thought.
I had to be at home for a month recovery. I could not use my hands or arms, which impaired me to go to the restroom alone, feed myself, or even flip channels. I could use my fingers so about half-way through I began working from home to exercise my fingers and wrist. Throughout this time, I was praying for peace, healing and patience. In the 4 weeks that I was at home I can count on one hand the family members and friends that came see me. I can count on one hand the people that called. I cannot count on two hands the people that I called and told that I was home and asked them to come see me. Out of those I called 2 came to see me. Five called to check on me whenever they has a second. Any many never called back. Friends and Family, you learn really quick who the ones are that care or are willing to put someone else before themselves. I longed for certain friends and family to come and they never did. I was not asking for pity from anyone, just a few minutes of their time to see a friendly face. I remember crying and begging my mom to let me go to WalMart. For those of you who dont know me, I strongly dislike WalMart and find it pretty nasty, I also am a very active person that thrives on being outdoors. While healing, my number one priority is sanitation as an infection could cause a MAJOR set back. I was willing to risk my health to see the likeness of another person besides my mom and stepdad. Of course, my mom was not, so there I sat for 3 weeks bound to a recliner, the bath, and the bed, INSIDE, with only Brandon, my boyfriend, (and in my absence since last post is now my fiance!) visiting on the weekends.
My stepdad at this time had been married to my mother for a year. He was a vital part of my recovery. He took me in as if he had been there my whole life, he fed me, let me walk around in my boy-shorts, took my to the bathroom (humbling moment), came home at lunch everyday, and sat with me, when no one else would.
When you are down, there is only once place to look, to God. This time in my life is the darkest place I have ever been in. I, for the most part, am pretty hard to bring down, but during this 4 wk period and even now, I have to stay VERY close to God in order to keep the devil out, because these feelings, this restraint, this loneliness will bring you down.
I actually had, not just someone, but an admired and respectful leader in my "home" church tell me that God only gives you so many chances before he gives you a reality check. My mentor had told me that God allowed this to happen to me because he feared I was straying from the Lord's path in my life. That, my friends, rocked my world. I cried for days and still have not forgotten those words that so deeply pierced my heart. This man that I had looked up to in church as the father of my church family and a mentor of my spiritual health spit on me, while I was down. He never even came to see me. In times of pain, you remember the most of others.
Today, I live my life by always doing my very best to be there when it counts.
Well as I was reading this oh course I cried! But one of the most touching things for me was when you talked about your stepdad. I too have a stepdad (which most people do not know). He and my mom got married when I was 5, during the wedding he not only said vows and gave a ring to my mom, he also did those things to me. He had only been around for a short time (they had known each other for 62 day when they got married)and he wasn't much of a kid person. But he made the commitment to be the dad that I never had. Not long after he became my adopted parent and my last name was change to Pickett. There have definitely been some major challenges alone the road but I could not have a better person to have been with me as WE got through it together. It is so humbling to know that someone not only chooses to be in your life but takes on a parenting/father role (probably the most difficult). I wake up everyday and I am so thankful that I have him!! He has gone above and beyond the definition of a Father, and he did not have to. I don't know if God put me in his life because he needed me or if he was put in my life because I needed him (it is probably a lot of both) but I would not be the same person that I am today without him!! He is truly a blessing to me, and your stepdad sounds very similar. God puts people in your life for a reason, but those people have the choice to take on the role! And it sounds like you and I are blessed to have these wonderful Dads in our lifes. God bless their sweet soles!
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